Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The Days After

I'm beginning to recover just a bit from all the holidays. We really did have a very successful NYNY party. It was well attended, even though we had competition from the stake. All of our people came except for two couples who's wives were both sick. It is so awful to be sick for Christmas and I felt sorry for both of them.

Our question for circle time was " What was one of the nicest things your spouse ever did for you, besides marrying you? It started out in a light hearted manner with my telling about how, when it began to be painful for me to do laundry, that Dick just started to do it all for me. In addition to that, he started doing all my floors, keeping them quite clean, I must say.

As we went around the circle the feeling seemed to change when one of our husbands lost it when talking about his sweet wife, who has been very ill with a brain problem that leaves her severely impaired. He finally had to put her in a nursing home, but he goes to see her at least twice a day. He brought her to the party and she seemed to enjoy it, even though she just stared into space with no expression at all on her face. She can't talk either, although I'm told that occasionally she will say a word or two, which leaves her husband convinced that she understands everything that is going on around her. This is a man who was schooled never to cry as a child and all of a sudden the tears started to come and he really lost it. As a result all of us started to cry and as the circle time kept going around, the husbands AND wives were pretty much crying as they told their stories.

When it came to one of the wives who is the only non member in our group, she said she just had to say that in her whole life she has never been in a group of so many people where she felt so much love. It was amazing to her that the expressions of love and good deeds could leave her so affected. She has terminal cancer and just isn't expected to live for long at all. She told about what her husband did for her by quiting his job and taking care of her full time, and doing such a great job of it too.

Needless to say, it was a very emotional evening as after we had completed our circle, more people had more to say that was very personal. It did seem to draw us all so close...........Dick said afterward that our question next year had to require a funny answer so that we would all be laughing!! I will do my best to think that one up.

Everyone said it was just the neatest experience though and they all seemed to have a great time. The food, as usual, was exceptional so it was very much worth all the effort we put into it to make it a great success.

Dick hasn't let me do a darned thing since the party. He got up early the next day and cleaned up all the mess as someone had spilled a glass of Martinelli's sparkling apple juice (what we used to toast the NYNY in) all over my table and floor. It was REALLY sticky and a job to clean up. When I did get up I found everything is pristine condition. That's my husband for you. What a guy!!

BTW he is getting a bit better but still is suffering from a very sore neck and shoulders. He has gone to three different chiropractors trying to find one that could help and he finally found one on the third try. He went today and got a really big crack on his neck, which is what he really felt he needed. It will be sore for awhile, I'm thinking. I rubbed it once with biofreeze and should have been doing it all along. I think I will do it again when he comes home from his meeting. His face looks a little bit like a raccoon now, with both eyes being rimmed by the black but the color is lightening. He wouldn't let me post another picture so you'll just have to picture it in your mind. In another couple of weeks he should look pretty normal.

I'm so upset that we didn't take one single picture at Christmas. There may be a couple on his I-phone but I don't know how to access them. He put some that he took on New Years Eve on the computer, but I don't know how to get to them from here, so I may wait for him to post one or two when he comes home before publishing this. I will be glad when we both stop hurting. As long as I had to keep going, I managed, but when I stopped, everything started hurting.......go figure.I do hope that all of you had a very fun New Years Eve and that you will all have a great New Year.

All ready for the guests to arrive.


  1. Your home looks so lovely all decorated and waiting for your party guests...it looks like you really go all out to make sure everyone has a good time! The circle question seems like it was inspired, even though it brought tears. I bet they really needed to talk and have someone to listen. I was touched by that sweet man who takes such good care of his wife...and your hubby sounds like a jewel for sure! He's one in a million and could write a book for husbands on the proper way to treat a spouse. I have a honey of a hubby too and he does laundry also...a keeper! I hope Dick can have his bruises gone quickly and I hope you can feel better too. Atleast you're some place nice and warm, not like us. It's warming up to maybe 30de. today...a heat wave! Have a great week Darlene!

  2. Glad your party went so well, Mom. And I hope Dick's neck feels better soon. I know what a drag that can be. (Make sure he keeps icing!)


  3. I love the picture of your home, ready for guests. I got a little teary reading about all of the sweet friends you have. A good partner is worth everything in this life (and forever after!) I'm so grateful to have found someone who understands me and helps me as much as my husband does. I try to do the same for him, but I feel I'm a pale comparison.
    I hope Dick feels better soon. A good chiropractor and plenty of BioFreeze should fix him right up. I love that stuff! Get your energy back and take care of yourself and that sweet man.

  4. Wow, what a sweet New Year's eve party. I think that question was inspired and that you all will be even closer as friends that ever before.
    You are such a trooper with all the physical things you have had to deal with. I do hope this New Year brings both you and Dick a healthier year. I too have an awesome husband that is always helping me; what would we do without these good men.
    Love and hugs to you for sharing this lovely post.

  5. What a wonderful evening you had!! Sometimes when remarkable people get together and all is right, there seems to be an overflow of something special that bonds you all together and the sharing will what you all will remember life long. The story is amazing...all stemming from your question! Dick is right...funny will be great next year! He sounds like such a wonderful gentleman! Hope he AND you get to feeling good for the New Year!!
    PS. You home looks so warm and inving!!

  6. Darlene, I'm so glad that you had such a great party on New Years Eve. What a positive way to start the new year.

    Being aware of the great blessings of having someone doing something special for us because of love is so uplifting. There were tears but the good kind.

    I think that your husband is very wise to plan on the circle question requiring a laughter response. As we age, we get more aware of the beauty of love as it was meant to be.

    Happy New Year. Hugs & love. JB

  7. Christmas and New Year celebrations tend to bring forth feelings that one usually hides deep inside, and I think we are all the better for letting them out once in a while. No one has ever been worse off after hearing that they are being loved, and no one for telling them either.

    PS Thank you for the very nice comment! I have in fact been in your neighbourhood once many years ago - Palm Springs - so I know that the nature is very different indeed. But I enjoyed my short stay immensely, not to mention the Aerial Tramway.

  8. I've been thinking about this post since you wrote it. On New Years Eve I kept watching the clock and wondering how you were doing at your party. I told Dennis about it and I could tell he thought it was such a great idea since we rarely stay awake to see the real New Year come in. But I have zero energy after Christmas so I could never pull this off.

    What a special evening this turned out to be for you and your friends. How wonderful that you all have that strong bond of friendship during the challenges of life. How very sweet about that man who visits his wife twice a day in the care center, and brought her to the party even though she doesn't talk. I loved reading all this.

    Truly a wonderful way to bring in the New Year....even if you were 3 hours early :)

  9. Oh, that sounds wonderful and it seems everyone had a great time. Your table and room is beautiful I bet your home is just gorgeous. How sweet Dick is to take care of things after the party. You probably need a good rest after all of what you did. I am sorry to hear he is still having pain in his neck and shoulders after that awful fall. I hope all the pain leaves and he is all healed very soon. You sound like me...I have missed some great pictures by not having my camera at gatherings. Take care sweet Darlene and have a great week. Hugs

  10. Darlene I am so glad you took the time to share this lovely evening with us. It brought tears to my eyes even and I was not there. lol
    Seriously your party was a huge success and I had to laugh about Dick wanting a funny answer next year.
    What a keeper you married my dear friend. I am so in love with Dick because he takes care of you. It takes a load off of me knowing that you have such a good loving hubby there with you.
    Truly a blessing and you in turn what a blessing Dick has in having you by his side.
    God is good!
    I read your comment on Sue's blog that you were not feeling good. I hope the doctor visit went okay and they gave you something to make you feel better.
    Thinking of you always